Patreon Round-Up: April 2022

So, HFE, what’s on your Patreon nowadays?

I’m glad you asked~!

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Quests for April 10-16, 2022

When you’ve got things to do and caves to hew, it’s important to set realistic goals. And also embrace that not all of your goals may get completed.

As a writer, wording is important to me. I love whimsical, fantasy-related words such as quests. If that’s what gets you going, do it!

Here are my writing quests for this random week in my life, in order of importance.

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Take Covid Seriously!

The following was originally a reply to a comment on an episode of Beyond the Scenes which discussed burnout amongst nurses during Covid-19. The comment reminded everyone to take burnout amongst other hospital employees (maintenance, food service, laundry) seriously too. It’s not fun working in a hospital at the best of times. There’s a strong disconnect between “civilians” and people who actually witness the effects of this pandemic in action. We need everyone who works in a hospital to be on top of their game. You can help us by being on top of your game, too. Wear your mask, social distance, and remember that this pandemic is far from over.

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Reading Where Decay Sleeps Part 1

Many apologies to Anna Cheung, the author who worked very hard on these poems. I’m not a poet and I know it. I’m writing these thoughts as I go so I can process what I’m reading better. Hopefully, others will appreciate them too.

If anybody out there struggles with poetry, you’re not alone. There’s help out there for us. Somewhere. I’ll google it later!

What I’m reading today is the Pallor Mortis (Birth) section of Anna Cheung’s debut anthology of Chinese Gothic horror poetry, Where Decay Sleeps, published by Haunt Publishing. I got this book as part of a kickstarter reward, just so everybody’s clear. While I could write a separate essay based on how the sunk-cost fallacy might combine with this fool and my money are soon parted to form a tornado of “I’m loving this book uncritically, I don’t give a damn!” James Stephanie Sterling has a whole video on the topic you can watch instead. Besides, I’m a hype man, not a salesman.

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American Economics, for the Ardan Dwarves

Alright, Durin’s Folk, I know I’ve been neglecting you, but as I said, I’ve chosen my side, the Elves! Besides, I tend to write about philosophical things rather than practical things. While I’m sure Middle-Earth Dwarves will also appreciate the principles of nonbinary, transgender, and intersex power, y’all got things to do and caves to hew!

That being said, let’s dive into the most impractical thing on the planet: the American economy.

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Rape of the Rings

Piko: So, apparently, Ardan Elves die when they get raped.

Lucky and Lockdown: What…!?

This piece makes a laughing matter out of how rape works in Middle-Earth in order to bring to light how poorly rape trials often go, and how poorly rape victims are often treated and depicted. The author acknowledges that rape is no laughing matter. If rape is not a subject matter you care for, especially when it’s treated like this, get thine eyes away from this puerile literature! We gotta find the humor where we can around here. If you can handle that, feel free to proceed.

The author also acknowledges that not every single story on AO3 is a sexfest. Not every single one of my AO3 stories is a sexfest either! It’s just that the sexfest (shipping in general, really) fics get the most attention there. Know your audience, and all that. If you seek free, adult AO3 literature that’s not all sex and shipping, I highly recommend SophiaCatherine and Thette. They were the Adults amongst my initial set of AO3 author friends. Sophia in particular taught me how to embrace writing about non-romantic, non-sexual relationships. Sophia was also the first to teach me the principles nonbinary power!

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Forgotten History

Norawarth: Internet social etiquette is also rather complicated, if you think about it. You have to remind your people, who fought a war over fiefdoms’ rights to own slaves instead of abolishing it like their king commanded them to do, that slavery is evil?

Harnor: The internet’s not just America, but yes.

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Size Matters Quite a Lot

Norawarth: I think the real reason you do not respect King Thranduil and Prince Legolas is because both of them were simply handed their kingdom. Lady Galadriel, Lord Celeborn, and Lord Elrond worked for theirs.

Calemir: That’s right, they did!

Norawarth: And as everyone knows, the Woodland Realmers are less wise and more dangerous. You consider them a childish obsession. You even consider King Thranduil “a king of yokels“!

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Simarils and the Point of Writing

Calemir: Pixxy, why don’t you just set up the tech we need to watch the movie version?

Pixxy Fire Fist: Yes! Absolutely! Lady Galadriel did more fighting across all six of these things than Lord Glorfindel and her husband! She didn’t fight just anybody, she fought the Dark Lord himself!

Toshiro and Tadashi: And Lord Elrond helped her. We’re Elrondgender now!

Pixxy Fire Fist: Two other stupid old men were there too.

Kenken: Keep in mind, we only have the basic cut. Maybe Lord Glorfindel and Lord Celeborn did some fighting in the extended editions. And Lord Glorfindel a single thing in the books: he guided Bilbo Baggins to Rivendell.

Norawarth: A role that was fulfilled instead by Lady Arwen. As Shadow of Chaos said, we are taking Lord Glorfindel on a new adventure: keeping this child alive long enough to hero-worship all the Ardan mothers he seeks to meet, slay a dragon, and perhaps join a Fellowship.

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